Words by Simon Difford
Back in the 1970s and 80s sexual innuendo named cocktails were at their height of popularity. Today, in the teenies, at a time when the cocktail world has reached the height of sophistication, cocktails served with a dose of innuendo are as popular as ever with the Slow Comfortable Screw Up Against the Wall one of the most viewed cocktails and inspiring a whole genre of Slow Screw cocktails.
A riff on the Screwdriver with sloe gin in place of vodka, the Slow (or sloe with an 'e') Screw cocktail emerged in 1980s. With the addition of Southern Comfort this became the Slow Comfortable Screw and so a new cocktail family was born with names inspired by the ingredients added to the original Slow Screw as follows:
Slow = sloe gin
Screw = orange juice from the Screwdriver cocktail
Comfortable = Southern Comfort
Up Against the Wall = Galliano from the Harvey Wallbanger
Cold = ice
Hard = overproof rum
Bang = also overproof rum
Kiss = amaretto
Mexican = tequila
Between the Sheets = light white rum and cognac from Between the Sheets cocktail
Fuzzy = peach schnapps from Fuzzy Navel cocktail
Thing is, made with freshly squeezed orange juice and quality ingredients, many of these Slow Screws are not half bad. And in common with tomato juice in a Bloody Mary, the key to a good Slow Screw is how the fresh juice is mixed. Shaking wrecks the body of the cocktail, hence most of the following are stirred (click names for recipes).
With: Sloe gin, dry gin and freshly squeezed orange juice.
We say: Reminiscent of a fruity screwdriver with botanical gin character. When made with a good sloe gin and freshly squeezed orange juice this is a great brunch cocktail.
Slow Comfortable Screw
With: Southern Comfort, bourbon, orange juice and sloe gin.
We say: With freshly squeezed juice, this is a sight tastier than its reputation might suggest. Long and refreshing. Spiked fresh orange juice with Southern Comfort and hints of sloe berry fruit.
Slow Comfortable Screw Against the Wall
With: Vodka, Southern Comfort, orange juice, sloe gin and Galliano liqueur.
We say: Galliano adds the wall (as in Harvey Wallbanger) and some herbal peppermint to this Slow Comfortable Screw. Yes, the name's corny but made with fresh orange, this drink is a good brunch or summertime option.
Slow Comfortable Screw Against a Cold Hard Wall
With: Vodka, sloe gin, Southern Comfort, orange juice, Galliano and overproof rum.
We say: Sloe gin is the 'Slow', Sothern Comfort is the 'Comfortable', vodka and orange juice are the 'Screw' (as in Screwdriver), ice is the 'Cold', overproof rum the 'Hard' and Galliano the 'Wall' (as in Harvey Wallbanger). The result is a much better drink than the sleazy name might suggest, at least it is when freshly squeezed orange juice is used.
Slow Comfortable Screw Against a Cold Hard Wall With a Kiss
With: Vodka, sloe gin, Southern Comfort, orange juice, amaretto, Galliano and overproof rum.
We say: The float of amaretto adds the "Kiss" to a Slow Comfortable Screw Against a Cold Hard Wall. If this was served in a Tiki mug it would be a Tiki Drink rather than a Disco Drink - it's fruity and boozy, and just edging towards the sweet side with that splash of amaretto adding rich almond notes.
Slow Comfortable Screw Against The Wall With A Bang
With: Vodka, overproof rum, sloe gin, Southern Comfort, orange juice and Galliano.
We say: One of the better Slow Comfortable Screw derivations - Overproof rum provides the "Bang". Boozy fruity and balanced rather than sweet - what's not to like?
Slow Comfortable Mexican Screw Against the Wall
With: Blanco tequila, vodka, Southern Comfort, orange juice, sloe gin and Galliano.
We say: Tequila adds a Mexican touch to the Slow Screw family to create a tasty riff on a Screwdriver. Great for a lazy summer afternoon or a barbeque.
Slow Comfortable Screw Between the Sheets
With: Vodka, light white rum, cognac, Southern Comfort, sloe gin and orange juice.
We say: The rum and cognac combo from Between the Sheets
served as part of the Slow Comfortable genre. As with so many of the Slow Comfortable cocktails, when made with freshly squeezed orange juice, this is a tasty, fruity and balanced long drink.
Slow Comfortable Fuzzy Screw Against the Wall
With: Vodka, Southern Comfort, sloe gin, peach schnapps, orange juice and Galliano.
We say: Peach schnapps is borrowed from the Fuzzy Navel to influence this member of the Slow Comfortable family, its presence gives this cocktail a distinctive sweet peachy note.
Considering the popularity of the Porn Star Martini, perhaps the next member of this family will be the Slow Hard Screw Up Against the Wall with a Porn Star on the Side?