This is really good! I agree that proper dilution is key. It helps mellow the Suze enough that it's bitterness doesn't dominate. The tequila comes through nicely, especially on the swallow, and of course lemon peel and Suze are a wonderful combination.
As much as the simpler original is delicious, I also decided to make a version with Gran Classico and Cynar, along with Appleton 12 and lime juice. Rather far enough from the Paper Boat to be a different drink, but quite tasty nonetheless. The rum stands up to the liqueurs, and there is a lot of depth and complexity.